Conversation skills that need attention in interpersonal communication

One is to choose topics.

The process of talking with acquaintances can naturally lead to various topics directly, but when people first meet or participate in a social activity, they should seriously consider how to choose topics.

When you meet for the first time, you have to introduce yourself.

In a sense, self introduction is a key to social interaction.

If you use this key well, you can make yourself happy in social activities; otherwise, it may bring you difficulties.

So, how can we introduce ourselves in order to achieve the success of communication? Generally speaking, we must be modest in introducing ourselves.

Some people like to make a self deprecating presentation to show modesty and reverence.

Under normal circumstances, the other person may feel that you are cliche and insincere. Maybe you really think you are disdained to talk about it, and that is self defeating.

Of course, it is also necessary to avoid showing off your talents at the very beginning, showing a fearful appearance, or making people think you are exaggerating and flashy.

Only by seeking truth from facts and introducing yourself properly can we give people the impression of being sincere and frank.

After introducing yourself, you have to choose the topic.

In order for the topic to be the medium for initial conversation, the basis for in-depth discussion and the beginning of indulgence, the topic should reach a standard: at least one person is familiar and able to talk; everyone is interested and loves to talk; there is room for discussion.

The main ways to find topics are:

Center flowering method.

In the face of many strangers, choosing the events that people care about, they draw people's attention around the attention center of people.

2. Impromptu introduction.

Using the material of that time, others and others skillfully, it will lead to conversation.

Third, ask for directions.

When talking with strangers, we first put forward some questions of "throwing stones". After having a little understanding, we can talk more freely.

Fourth, follow the interesting approach.

Ask the stranger's interest, follow the interesting hair, and get into the topic smoothly.

Because what the other person is most interested in is always the most familiar, the most talked about and the most willing to talk about.

The two is about dialogue.

Sociability

It is not only different from personal talk, but also from public speaking. It is a dialogue between listening and speaking.

The essence of dialogue is not that you speak in a single sentence, but in the echo of each other.

A truly successful dialogue should be a process of mutual response: every sentence should be the continuation of each other's sentences, respond to each other's sentences, and be able to quote and repeat appropriately in their own words.

In this way, psychological communication between them is real.

　　為了能成功地進(jìn)行對話，應(yīng)避免以下九種不正確的對話方式：(1)打斷別人的談話或搶接別人的話頭，擾亂別人的思路;(2)忽略了使用解釋與概括的方法，使對方一時難以領(lǐng)會你的意圖;(3)由于自己注意力的分散，迫使別人再次重復(fù)談過的話題; (4)像傾瀉炮彈似的連續(xù)發(fā)問，使人窮于應(yīng)付;對他人的提問漫不經(jīng)心，言談空洞，不著邊際;(5)隨便解釋某種現(xiàn)象，妄下斷語，借以表現(xiàn)自己是內(nèi)行;(6)避實(shí)就虛，含而不露，讓人迷惑不解;(7)不適當(dāng)?shù)貜?qiáng)調(diào)某些與主題風(fēng)馬牛不相及的細(xì)微末節(jié)，使人厭煩;(8)當(dāng)別人對某個話題興趣盎然時，你卻感到不耐煩，強(qiáng)行把話題轉(zhuǎn)移到自己感興趣的方面去;(9)將正確的觀點(diǎn)、中肯的勸告佯稱為錯誤的，使對方懷疑你話中有戲弄之意。

The three is to shift the topic.

In the two case, we need to change the topic:

One thing is that they have lost interest in the topic they talk about, and the other side is very optimistic.

At this point, you don't have to bite your head and listen to it. Instead, you need to ask an enlightening question, or take a sentence from the other person, and naturally connect to another issue that you both are interested in.

In this way, the self-esteem and conversation of the other party have not been damaged or even realized.

The other is to observe the reaction of the other person consciously and sensitively, and to feel the hint of the other side and restrain their conversation.

For example, when the other party shows boredom, it is time to stop.

Four is

"Small".

In conversation, if you can pay attention to the following "small" things, it can produce the effect of improving interpersonal relationship.

These "little things" mean:

(1) let's go ahead.

Let others speak first, on the one hand, you can show your modesty. On the other hand, you can take this opportunity to observe each other and give yourself a measure of time and deliberation.

(2) taboo.

No matter who you talk to, you should understand each other and avoid the taboo topics of your partner cleverly, such as personal privacy, illness and things you don't want to mention.

We should learn to look at colors and look at them. If we find that we have accidentally touched each other's taboo, we should immediately avoid them when we have unpleasant colors.

(3) modest.

Social psychologists have found that people generally don't like people who hang "me" on their lips.

Therefore, we should avoid overexposing one's own talent and learn to say "how do I do".

The humble attitude is always easy to accept.

In general, people always accept a person before accepting his opinion.

(4) sincere.

The attitude of conversation is sincere.

It is hard to be accepted even if there are good opinions.

(5) humor.

Just right humor can make people feel deeply absorbed and appreciate profound philosophy.

Using humor appropriately can add a lively and pleasant atmosphere to social interaction.

But witty conversation comes from the organic combination of a person's accomplishment and talent and can not be forced.

If we only talk about some funny jokes, or even insult others, we can only show our frivolity and boredom.

(6) a pet phrase.

Although the phrase can reflect individuality, most of them are cumbersome in language. Even if the content is quite attractive, if you add some "this", "that", "ah" and "ah" phrases, it is as hard to swallow as a mixture of sand in cooked white rice.

Therefore, we should cut off the mantra as a language burden.

(7) interjection.

Try to get the other person to speak and interrupt.

If you really need to interrupt in the middle of the road, you should also ask the other party to agree. In a deliberate tone, say, "excuse me, can I ask you a question?" or "can I put in a sentence?" this will avoid misunderstanding.

(8) balance.

If a few people talk together, you have to be careful not to focus on one person and neglect others.

In addition to your interlocutors, you can occasionally visit other people with your eyes.

For a silent person, he should try to make him open his mouth. If he asks him, "what do you think of this matter?" this will break the silence and witty way.